Last updated: April 17, 2025
Have you ever hosted a party where half the people who RSVP’d never showed up?
We’ve all been there. The difference between a packed, energetic gathering and an awkward, sparse one often comes down to one simple factor: party reminder messages.
After hosting hundreds of successful cocktail parties in New York City and Austin, I’ve discovered that strategic party reminder messages are the unsung heroes of party planning.
Before your party, send a series of pre-party messages that show you’ve put effort into the planning. I call these “reminder messages” for obvious reasons.
These reminders aren’t just calendar notifications. They’re excitement-building, attendance-boosting tools that transform your event from “maybe I’ll go” to “I wouldn’t miss it.” When used correctly, they:
- Generate excitement for your party,
- Keep your party top-of-mind, and
- Ensure high attendance.
When you use reminder messages for your party, you’ll stand out in a culture that thrives on the image of people who are too cool to care.
TL;DR
- Three key reminders: Send messages seven days before, three days before, and the morning of your party.
- Guest bios matter: Brief highlights about attendees create anticipation and provide conversation starters.
- Format for readability: Use clear structure with important details highlighted at the top.
- Embrace promotion: Don’t be shy about expressing enthusiasm—it builds excitement.
- Address plus-one policies: Clearly communicate whether guests can bring friends.
- Real results: These techniques helped one host increase attendance from 30% to 50%.
Why you should listen to me: I've hosted hundreds of happy hour events and cocktail parties in New York City and Austin, Texas. New York Magazine once called me a host of "culturally significant" parties. But don't take their word for it. Keep reading to see my tips that will help you meet new people.Less Ghosting, More Hosting
Unless you’re hosting a wedding or the Met Gala, no-shows are an inevitable part of life for event organizers. People will tell you they are coming to your party and then never show up.
Don’t take it personally. People are busy. No-shows happen for a variety of reasons, such as work, family, or social emergencies. Or perhaps someone just decided that going home to relax was a better use of the evening.
Your job is to promote your event to guests in a way that generates excitement. From the moment you create your invite until the day of your party, keep your party top of mind. Reminders persuade your invitees that your event is special. When you use these, you’ll set yourself apart before the party even starts.
The 3 Party Reminder Messages
Send this sequence of reminder messages to your guests:
- Seven Days Before: Send out a short reminder that includes logistical info plus a fun, light-hearted image attachment.
- Three Days Before: This is my favorite. Send another reminder that includes a brief biographical note about many of your guests. I call these your Guest Bios. This message takes the most time to create but has the potential to be the single greatest hook to ensure excitement and solid attendance.
- Morning of the Party: Send a final reminder. Include any logistical information—like address and phone number—clearly up top.
You’ll find the reasoning for each of these plus examples below.
Pro Tip
I create calendar notes for myself because I’ve found that forgetting to send even one can drop attendance.
Download the Google Document I made where you can easily copy, edit, and paste the party reminder messages I outlined in my book, The 2-Hour Cocktail Party below.
Video: Party Reminder Messages
If you like video, I filmed this quick summary of the 3 most important party reminder messages. Watch it for an overview.
How to Send Reminders
Use email or the messaging tools built into your event platform to send your reminders.
Mass messages are bad for invitations, but they’re great for communicating with people who have already RSVPed. They’ve signed up to get them!
If you’re using email, blind carbon copy (BCC) everybody who has said Yes or Maybe to your RSVP.
Send the email to yourself and include all of your guests in the BCC: field. You’ll respect their privacy and email addresses when you use BCC instead of carbon copy (CC). You’ll also save your guests from unintended reply-all cancellation notes or questions.
But Don’t Worry…
Perhaps you worry that you’re over-communicating with your guests.
This is a totally normal concern, but unnecessary. In all my time as a host, no one has ever told me that they heard from me too many times in the lead-up to the party. Instead, what I’ve gotten is a consistently high proportion of RSVPs actually showing up to my party.
You want your event to be a success. You want people to enjoy themselves. Your enthusiasm is genuine. Share it authentically and you will never annoy people. Fun reminders require nothing of recipients beyond a quick read. Far from being annoying, they can brighten the days of your guest list and add to their anticipation of your party.
Overcoming Common Reminder Message Concerns
Beyond worrying about over-communicating, many hosts have other concerns about sending structured reminder messages:
- “It seems too formal for my casual gathering.”
- “My friends might think I’m being uptight or controlling.”
- “I don’t want to sound like I’m sending a corporate invitation.”
Remember that structure actually liberates your guests from uncertainty. Far from making your event feel rigid, clear communication shows you respect their time and want them to have the best possible experience.
You can adjust the language and tone of these messages to match your personal style while still maintaining their effectiveness. The templates provided are starting points, not strict requirements.
Most importantly, well-crafted reminders show you care about the event’s success and your guests’ enjoyment. That’s something everyone can appreciate!
Seven Days Before
The first reminder is a short note that tells your guests you’re excited about the party and looking forward to seeing them. Send this message to people who have RSVP’d as well as to those whom you haven’t heard back from. It’s a subtle calendar reminder and a hint to RSVP for those who haven’t done so yet.
I like to attach a funny GIF, meme, or group photo from one of my previous parties. This keeps the reminder message fun.
Three Days Before
Prepare to step up your reminder game. Just when people are most likely to develop potential last-minute scheduling conflicts, you send an irresistible reminder using Guest Bios to ramp up anticipation and commitment.
The Power of Guest Bios
Guest bios are more than just information about attendees—they’re a powerful tool for creating anticipation and ensuring attendance. Here’s why they work so well:
- They make guests feel special and valued—being featured in a bio shows people you appreciate them.
- They provide instant conversation starters for attendees who might not know each other.
- They generate curiosity about who else will be at the party.
When writing guest bios, keep them brief (1-2 sentences) and include both professional and personal details. A good format to follow is:
“[Name] works as a [profession]. They [interesting personal fact or hobby]. Ask them about [conversation starter]!”
Include bios for at least half your guest list or eight people (whichever is larger). You don’t need to feature everyone, but make it clear there will be “plus a few more great people!” at the end of your list.
–> See more about Guest Bios, and how to write them, here.
Clarify Your Plus-One Policy
Your three-day reminder is also the perfect time to clarify your policy on plus-ones. Be clear about:
- Whether guests can bring someone not on the original invite list.
- How additional guests should RSVP (ideally on your event page).
- Any limitations on total attendees (if space is a concern).
If you’re open to plus-ones, a simple line like “Feel free to bring a friend—just have them RSVP on the event page so I can include them in the count!” works well.
If you’re limiting additional guests, you can say something like “Due to space limitations, I’m keeping this gathering to invited guests only. Looking forward to seeing you!”
Being upfront about this policy prevents awkward situations and helps you manage your party size effectively.
Morning of the Party
Send one final party reminder message to your guests on the morning of your party. Copy the last message you sent three days before your party to use as a template. Then update the subject line and add a fresh introduction to express your excitement.
Use this message to inform your guests of any important details—for example, directions to your home or any special instructions. Maybe your house is at the end of a cul-de-sac, and you’ve tied a big red balloon on the mailbox. Add that information to this message.
Pro Tip
Provide guests with your phone number in case they need to contact you with last-minute questions or directions.
But it’s not just about details. This final message is particularly aimed at any invitees who might be thinking about backing out or who might have even forgotten about your event. It’s your final chance to ensure a strong turnout. Keep it fun and include the Guest Bios again for those who didn’t read them in the last message.
Don’t Be Afraid to Self-Promote
Many hosts feel uncomfortable hyping up their parties in party reminder messages. They worry about sounding inauthentic or bothering their guests with too many communications.
This discomfort is completely normal, especially for first-time hosts. But remember: genuine enthusiasm for bringing people together isn’t annoying—it’s contagious!
Your guests want to attend an exciting event. When you express confidence that your party will be fun, people believe you and look forward to it more. Your positive energy sets expectations high and creates a self-fulfilling prophecy of success.
Self-promotion is only problematic if you don’t have your guests’ best interests at heart. When you’re genuinely committed to hosting a great event and bringing people together, promote it enthusiastically!
Real Results: Jason’s Story
Need proof that good reminder messages make a difference?
Jason, who hosted monthly meetups for freelancers in Atlanta, consistently suffered from low turnout at his events. Before implementing proper reminder messages, Jason reported an average attendance rate of just 30%—typically sixty people would RSVP, but only twenty would show up.
After learning about the importance of guest bios in pre-event messaging, Jason began including them in his reminders. The results were immediate and impressive: his attendance rate jumped from 30% to 50%. That’s a significant improvement from just one simple addition to his communication strategy!
This real-world example demonstrates how thoughtful, well-structured party reminder messages can dramatically improve your event’s attendance and success.
Formatting Your Reminder Messages for Maximum Impact
How your messages look matters almost as much as what they say. Follow these formatting guidelines:
- Use clear, direct language that conveys your excitement.
- Make party reminder messages easy to read with short sentences and plenty of line breaks.
- Put the most important information at the top (date, time, location).
- Bold key sections to draw attention to critical details.
- Keep the tone light and fun to match the spirit of your event.
Well-formatted party reminder messages show professionalism while still maintaining a casual, friendly vibe. Your guests will appreciate the clarity and thoughtfulness.
Party Reminder Messages Example
For a less casual introduction that could be used for a professional event, I sent this:
Your final reminder should show your guests that you’re excited for the party. Give them tongue-in-cheek reasons why they should be, too.
“Great cocktails, amazing people, and free high fives,” for example. I include a few emojis in my reminders, but if that’s not your style, delete them. You could also attach a fun picture of yourself, a family-friendly meme, or one of your favorite GIFs.
More Party Reminder Messages
I made a PDF that you can download here that has everything you need: copy-and-paste templates, multiple reminder messages for various parties (formal, casual, birthday, etc.), and a few other things:
- Funny party reminder messages
- Gentle reminders
- RSVP reminders
Or get the Google Document I made where you can easily copy, edit, and paste the party reminder messages for your next party!
Download it here by putting in your email address in the form below. If you can’t see that form, click here to download the file manually.
Conclusion
Party reminder messages are important because they generate excitement, keep your party top-of-mind, and ensure high attendance.
Remember to send this sequence of party reminder messages:
- Seven days before,
- Three days before, and
- The morning of the party.
Follow these tips and see how your party will stand out among others!
Do you want to learn how to UPGRADE your parties? Want to host an amazing event that is easy, fun, and has your guests begging for more? Do you want to make new friends, build big relationships, and boost your career? You can do all of that with a simple 2-Hour Cocktail Party. Check out the book that I wrote and download the first few chapters for free to see exactly how it works.
Send me an email with the date of your first party! I’d love to hold you accountable and answer any of your questions. My mission is to convince 1000 different people to host their own cocktail party.
