Last updated: September 6, 2022
For your first party, aim for fifteen confirmed guests.
I’ve found that fifteen people at a cocktail party gives the best balance.
Disadvantages of Fewer People
With fewer people—like seven or eight—you’re more likely to get trapped in a single group conversation or have an uncomfortable silence in the room.
The connections will be less free-flowing, and the room will lack energy. Any no-shows will hit you hard.
Downside of Too Many Guests
On the other hand, if you have too many guests—say, thirty—managing the logistics becomes a big challenge.
There’s a lot of energy with a lot of people, but your party can descend into carnage.
You might wake up in a pile of smelly wine bottles with rotten pizza crusts on the floor and a court summons for local noise violations. (It happens to the best of us.)
After your first few parties, you can experiment with hosting more or less than fifteen people. See how you enjoy the experience and adapt this formula later to fit your style.
Invite More Than You Need
Over-inviting is a natural part of party planning.
If you want fifteen people to come to your party, you’ll need to invite twenty to thirty people total.
Don’t Fear Rejections
It’s unlikely that everyone will say yes. That’s normal.
Is it because they don’t like you? Maybe! But probably not.
Try to remember: people have a lot going on in their lives.
I still frequently experience the feeling of rejection when guests turn down my invitations. Try not to take it personally when this happens.
And besides, when have you ever liked someone less because they invited you to a party?
You want 15-20 people to attend your first cocktail party using my formula.
You’ll need to invite more than that to actually get 15-20 people to show up.
Create an RSVP page before you invite your guests.